Forge

It was my 8th birthday. I remember that sometime during the evening, I was surrounded by elders. I got a large bar of chocolate. I decided that I will eat only one square a day so that it lasts me a long time. I was gifted some money which I pocketed with glee. A lot of the elders just offered me blessings for a long life, which I felt were hollow presents, not worth receiving. The priest offered me his gift, that I forge a great relationship with God, which I have never understood. I did not know what to make of his pious present. I asked my mother what the priest meant, by saying what he did the next day. She explained to me that forging relationships with others is what life is all about. Friendships and relationships have always given me immense pleasure. A crowded elevator is an opportunity for me to end up being a less of a stranger by the time the door opens up, and the steam of togetherness evaporates. I was in Dallas about a year ago for work, when my Uber driver and I forged a friendship on my way to a lonely dinner. We ended up at his house and ended up having a sumptuous ethnic dinner from his country. I have had some toxic relationships along the way when people forged a relationship with the sole purpose of extracting benefit for themselves at my expense. The isolation that Covid has forced upon us has lead me to forge a relationship that the priest probably wished for me decades ago. A healthy and loving relationship with my own self which I have lacked all my life. I had always wanted to be somebody else but not myself. I do not dislike myself anymore. I am dealing with my own imperfections……..